By Emily Rosen

ERosen424@aol.com

www.emilyrosen424.com

You may be one of them. Or if not, you surely KNOW one of them. They are truly all over the place — the mature male (50ish and older), recently widowed or divorced who finds himself suddenly solo.

Well, yes, there is the myth that single men “have it made,” and get sympathy.

That’s not always so. Many of these males had been married since just after puberty and they are now lost in a whole new world of dating and/or simply trying to figure out how to do the laundry and what to do with coupons, or actually picking up the phone in order to promote some kind of social life — some of the many things that “she” did for him.

Along comes Hal Spielman (of New York and South Florida), a successful marketing businessman whose

long-time loving wife has died. He in fact, is suddenly solo. After the first flourish of friends-in-sympathy, he is settling into a new life and all the unexpected baggage that comes with it.

Thus was born the website www.suddenlysolo.org and spawned from that, the just published book “Suddenly Solo: A Lifestlye Roadmap For The Mature, Widowed or Divorced Man,” co-written with his friend Marc Silbert (www.amazon.com).

“I undertook seven separate and distinct research studies that provide the foundation for information in this book,” said Spielman— whose life work has been in Market Research, “thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours having been spent on primary research.” But in the writing, the book is a “relaxed and conversational journey about living experiences.”

Former CEO of AARP Bill Novelli states in the book’s Afterword that this slim volume helps with the “What Next?” It offers a cornucopia of “what nexts” from which to choose, allowing that one size does not fit all. A quick surf through the table of contents hints at some really valuable “take home” information – light and full of good humor, the latter being reason enough to get hold of it.

Starting with Malnutrition Avoidance (the hobby chefs among you can skip that one) on through Loneliness, to the Aha Moment when you realize that dating rituals and standards have gone 180 degrees since last you were there, and then on to the Internet and some juicy sex specific “rules of the current game” to the final and funny “glossary” for the troglodytes among you – this turns out to be fun for all! Women love it too. And the progeny of those afflicted can’t wait to gift it to Papa.

Spielman, a sociologist by training, who retired in 2008 from the marketing and communications research firm he co-founded, enjoys his South Florida book tour stops where he is constantly encountering and interviewing more Suddenly Solos for his website.

Co-author Marc Silbert, a principle in the international organization Accountemps and Robert Half Personnel Service as president of its New York City operations, is happy when Hal is “working the rooms.” It’s a win-win all around.

For the couch potato or the bar fly, the introvert or the party guy, for the nerd or the “hottie,” there’s something for every Suddenly Solo guy in this book, with constant exhortation and guidelines on how to “Get out there and live!”

And, ladies, you’re next!