“Truth is in the eyes, lies stay behind them.”

That is the adage that came to my mind this week as I chanted the trifold blessing of the Kohanim: “May the Eternal bless you and protect you. May the Eternal’s countenance shine upon you and be gracious unto you. May the face of the Eternal lift up before you and grant you peace!” I will never forget Leonard Nimoy’s character, Mr. Spock, holding his hand out the same way that the Kohanim do and giving that wonderful Vulcan greeting, “Live long and prosper.” The Kohanim kept a space in between each set of fingers. You see, it wasn’t just that the Kohanim were looking eye-to-eye with those they were saying the blessing on, those who were being blessed were looking through that space, making another most intimate form of contact. They were looking beyond that space; they were looking into the face of G-d, to see G-d’s eyes, and, as they do so, G-d responded in kind by looking directly back into their eyes as well.

“Truth is in the eyes.”

Perhaps that is why some people who are having difficulty in their relationships have trouble looking into the eyes of the one they are (temporarily) on the outs with. And who among us hasn’t gotten so upset by someone else’s behavior that we say, “I can’t even stand to look at them” or, “I don’t want to see them anymore”?

Let me go back to Mr. Spock’s Vulcan greeting for a moment, to “Live long and prosper.” What is the first sentence of the Birkat Kohanim? “May the Lord bless you and protect you.” What are the goals of blessing and protection? According to Rabbi Stephen Kushner, this has to do with the bare necessities of life: a home, food, clothing, the material things we need, the things that we need in order to prosper.

In the second verse, we mention grace, or if you prefer another translation, beauty. We don’t need grace and beauty to survive. Grace and beauty in our lives are beyond mere survival. They are about the extras in life that enhance our life, that make us content and give us meaning. But, as Rabbi Kushner points out, grace and beauty come from the light of G-d. In other words, we are not only getting something from G-d, we are actually getting a piece of G-d, the light of His love.

In the final verse, we talk about that all elusive Shalom — peace. That peace comes from intimacy with God and with those we love, by seeing each other in all our goodness, in all our love, and with all our perfect imperfections.

That is why in the third verse we read, “May the face of the Eternal lift up before you…” because when G-d lifts up his face, He is allowing us to make eye contact with Him and He is making eye contact with us, the eye contact that brings intimacy, and that intimacy brings peace.

Eye contact, as Rabbi Kushner points out, requires vulnerability and it requires trust. That desire to look into another’s eyes gives us the strength to get over our own insecurities, and to open our eyes and our heart to another human being and to G-d as well.

It is that intimacy that brings us to wholeness.

Of course, we are taught that no one can see G-d, at least not physically, but, when we make eye contact, we do not need to see a body. Looking into each other’s eyes, we come upon an intimate moment when we see deep into each other’s souls, and, hopefully, we see each other through the eyes of love. For it is through the eyes of love that we truly connect at the most intimate of levels.

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Rabbi Ezring is the Spiritual Leader of Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach, 201 S. Military Tr., Deerfield Beach, FL 33441. Regular Shabbat services are open to everyone on Saturday mornings from 9 to 11:30 a.m. High Holiday tickets still available 954-421-7060.

By Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Some of the stories in the Torah seem like what we would hear about on the TV news; stories about families not getting along, threats and killings, stories about lies, deceit and rape. The stories are about wrestling, not only with others, but with ourselves.

I often ask people who are low in spirits and feel stuck in darkness some questions. One is what they do in the morning and often their answer is they turn on the news.

And when I ask the same people what they do before going to sleep, they tell me that they get into bed and turn on the news. There goes any hope of having sweet dreams.

Many get so upset over the newscasts that they wrestle with themselves and with the covers on their bed all night long. And then they can’t figure out why they feel so miserable in the morning.

We are surrounded by bad news and it often seems that we are surrounded by bad people as well.

Have you ever watched someone who is behaving wickedly? If you have, you might have noticed an odd thing. You see, the first time someone commits a particular sin, you can actually tell from their facial expression and body language that they are wrestling with themselves as to whether they can actually do such a thing. But as they keep committing the same wickedness over and over they can become immune to that inner struggle, that self wrestling match.

We have people who thrive on stirring up trouble. They may try to tell themselves that they are doing it for a holy purpose, but they soon become victims of their own point of view and refuse to accept any other version of events. They stir the pot and others are grossly affected.

Take the case of the recent killing in Ferguson.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t know who was in error, but I do know that the pot was stirred to the point that, if anything but the verdict that the mob wanted was given, well, the threats were already there.

And, as could have been predicted, there were those who took it as an excuse for looting, for hate and destruction.

And those who sat glued to the news went into the usual diatribe that things have never been this bad, that the world as we know it is falling apart.

But if you watched the news really closely, you might have caught a moment where the darkness was overcome by a very bright light.

A police officer noticed a young boy crying and motioned for the lad to come to him. Can you imagine how scared that young boy must have been being called over to a white police officer.

He was shaking a little but the officer calmed him.

“Why are you crying?” the officer asked.

The boy replied that he was sad about the protest and sad about all that was going on in the world…

The officer and the 12-year-old went on to talk about school and summer vacations. Having comforted the boy, the officer looked down on the ground and saw the sign the lad had been carrying (“Free hugs”) and asked if he could have one … and there it was for all to see on the news.

That little boy and that officer are wondrous examples of how things can be. I would reward 12-year-old Devonte and Sgt. Barnum with kindling the first two candles on the Chanukiah (The Chanukah Menorah) as they are great examples of adding light to take away the darkness.

And I would give them a coupon book good for unlimited hugs whenever and wherever they should need them.

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

And while you’re at it, why not stop by Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach (201 S. Military Trail, Deerfield Beach, FL 33442) on a Saturday Morning for services and a free hug! And believe me, you haven’t had a hug until you have been hugged by Rabbi Ezring. LOL.

Many people had family come in from out of town to be with their loved ones during Thanksgiving. Many invited friends over to join in. And those friends came bearing gifts.

Giving gifts can be a marvelous expression of love. In the Torah, we read that when Jacob first saw the love of his life, he wept. The Sages ask, “Why did Jacob weep?” Some say he wept in joy. But that’s just one of many answers.

Rashi gives several reasons that are all indeed possibilities. But there is one particular one he gives that stuck out during this time where everybody is busy looking for gifts. You see, one of Rashi’s explanations is that Jacob cried because he had no gifts to give her. He had been robbed and, at that moment, he had nothing.

I thought about that a lot and I wondered what I would say to someone who came to me crying that he or she had no gifts to give, and my response would have been, “But you do have a gift you can give, you can give of yourself. You can give your love and devotion. You can sing or make someone laugh. You can hold a hand and give a hug. You can give of your time, of yourself, and that just might be the greatest gift of all.

What good is giving a bunch of flowers on the holiday if your usual behavior throughout the year does not show your love? I watched during Thanksgiving as various friends and family members came to express their love in the health centers and I caught some very odd behavior in a few cases. I saw one longtime friend come to visit a patient and she brought her a giant box of chocolates. The only problem was that the patient was a severe diabetic, which made that chocolate a very unloving gift. Another patient had a relative who brought them two bottles of wine, but, guess what? That’s right; the patient was a recovering alcoholic.

There is a tale in the folklore of our people about a man who comes to his Rabbi in the middle of a crowded place and goes on and on about how much he loved the Rabbi, about how wonderful the Rabbi is, and about how he adores him. The Rabbi responds, “You don’t love me. If you did then you would know how much I dislike such displays.”

Speaking of gift giving, you probably missed a special day that happened on the 2nd of December. It is known as “Giving Tuesday” It is a day to think about donating your time and your money to those in need.

Our bellies are filled from Thanksgiving and will soon be filled with latkes and jelly donuts for Chanukah, but there are so many who hunger and thirst for food, for health, for love. Let us show our thanks to G-d by being there for those who are more in need of gifts than we have ever been.

I should tell you that I am not a fan of Thanksgiving. I am not a fan of Mother’s Day either. I think the idea of acknowledging your mother should be a daily event and I feel the very same in regard to giving thanks.

What do you have to give? Give of yourself. Give “With all your heart, with all your soul and with all your might.”

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Rabbi Ezring is the spiritual leader of Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach. Join us for worship on Saturday mornings at 9:30 a.m. and give us the gift of your presence.

Thanksgiving is soon upon us and, once again, our children will hear a beautiful version of the first Thanksgiving. They will hear about Native Americans and pilgrims feasting together on corn, turkey and yams, oh, and let’s not forget cranberry sauce.

Many adults who have given up on the myth of Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny still cling to the Thanksgiving story they learned as little ones.

I have the same problem with those who dropped out of Temple life after their Bar or Bat Mitzvah. They stopped learning about God and Torah, and, now, even in their upper years, they have a 13-year-old view of God and His word. The problem is that there is much more to these biblical stories. And, there is much more to the Thanksgiving story.

Let me share just a few things with you about Native Americans. Did any of you move down here from Canarsie? Well guess what, it was named after the Canarsee Indians. And for those of you who spent time in Rockaway; guess what, it was named after the Rechaweygh (pronounced – Rockaway) Indians.

Many of the tribes were quite content before the pilgrims came. One tribe lived in one area and another tribe in another area. And, while they lived on the land, they considered it owned by a higher power. They were respectful enough of each other not to move too close. But if another group needed to use some of the land for awhile, or they needed some food or some water… no problem. You see, the Native Americans didn’t fence themselves in, nor did they fence others out. But then the pilgrims came, pilgrims who had this concept of land ownership.

Now, let me focus on the feast of Thanksgiving. The family sitting around the table on Thanksgiving night often follows a tradition of having each one say something they are thankful for. So what, you might ask, were pilgrims thankful for?

The pilgrims there did not have it so easy. They had neglected to bring others with them from their homeland who had the skills that would be needed to survive. This was especially true in regard to food. To get food, you needed to be able to hunt. And not only were they lousy hunters, but, when they did get lucky enough to catch something, they weren’t exactly great in the butchering department either. In other words, they could not catch it, they could not kill it and they could not skin it.

And this is where the religious background came in handy. With so little food to eat they came up with days of fasting. Yes, they would pray on these days. They would pray for something to eat, as they were darn near starving.

The days on which they were permitted to eat became joyous days of thanks … hence, Thanksgiving Day. And their feast probably consisted of some bread and potatoes.

This Thanksgiving, I want you to take the time to research, to learn as an adult. What I’ve written today might not be totally accurate; but, I can tell you this, neither is the story we learned as children. Keep learning. Seek the truth and give thanks!

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Rabbi Ezring is the spiritual leader of Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach. If you would like to be part of a small, haimishe, Conservative Congregation stop by and become a part of our family. (Services – Saturdays at 9:30 a.m. followed by a beautiful Kiddish and friendly conversation. Temple is located one block South of Hillsboro Blvd on Military Trail).

Well, here we are in the midst of another election and once again my neighbor has busied himself sending out e-mails, as he would like everyone to vote for the party and candidates that he, in his infinite wisdom, feels are best for the job.

I don’t know about you, but when I apply for a position, I try and highlight my accomplishments. But I have to wonder, what if, instead of listing my accomplishments, I put down all the reasons why the candidates should not even be considered.

That’s what my neighbor is doing. Not one of his e-mails say anything positive about those he would like everyone to vote for, rather they all spout negatives about the candidates and political party that he is against; and he is rabidly against them.

I did some fact checking and there are a lot of things in those things he forwards that, simply stated, aren’t true. He even earmarks certain ones especially for me and for those who he thinks would have the same concerns that I do. So I get all the ones about how this one or that one is anti-Semitic, or not supportive of Israel. Now, he doesn’t just send one or two; no, I’m talking about multiple e-mails on a daily basis. I have nicely asked him (more than once) to please stop sending them to me, but it would appear each time I do so, it somehow encourages him to send even more.

I’m not quite sure why he thinks behaving in this manner would get me to agree with him. Hammering someone over and over again, well, to me that’s a form of bullying.

Oddly enough, while his goal is to get me to see the world his way, to agree with him, his methods are having just the opposite effect.

And what would happen if he got everyone to see things his way? I can tell you this, if every one of us voted for the same candidate, we would have no need to hold elections. We would have no need for a two-party system. All we would have to do is go to my neighbor and he would tell us who will be our governor, our senator, our congressman and our president.

He was spouting his beliefs at the pool the other day and, at one point, he said that anyone who voted for the other side “was a fool and must hate this country.” And that’s when someone listening said, “We just don’t speak the same language.”

Biblically, we talk about a time where everyone spoke the same language. And, in case you forgot, they began to build a tower, the Tower of Babel. And that’s how I felt about my neighbor’s talk because to me, he was just babbling on. God destroys the Tower of Babel and He purposely differentiated people by making it so they don’t all speak the same language. Do you think for a moment that God did this so that we should hate anyone who speaks a different tongue?

Or maybe, just maybe, He did it so that we could learn to respect one another even though we don’t speak the same language. And, if that’s the case, then maybe we could learn to respect each other despite our differences, our differences in country of origin, skin color, religion and, dare I say it, political leanings.

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Rabbi Ezring is the Spiritual Leader of Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach where you can hear his uplifting messages during Shabbat Services (Saturdays – 9:30a.m.). The Temple is located one block South of Hillsboro on the west Side of Military Trail.

(Great thanks to Rabbi Jacqueline Mates-Muchin for getting the creative juices flowing.)

I know you probably weren’t expecting a Rabbi to bring up Valentine’s Day, but, in case you haven’t figured it out in reading my columns here in The Observer, I am a romantic at heart. So, when I studied the Torah Portion the other week, I couldn’t help but find connections between them.

This Torah reading gave a description of the special clothing, the Kohanim, that Aaron and his sons were to wear. Since Valentine’s Day was coming up, many ads were pushing clothing and jewelry. They showed items of adornment that can be worn on the head, the neck and on the wrist. Why are these items shown as gifts for Valentine’s Day? Well, aside from the fact that the stores are hoping to make lots of money, hopefully, these types of gifts are a way of telling someone you love that they are special to you.

After all, I would not advise you to get the love of your life a new vacuum or a new mop along with a Cupid Card. Why? Because that would not be a very good way of saying that they are special.

So how does this connect with the Torah Reading? Well, for that, we have to look at why Aaron and his sons had special vestments to wear and I can think of no better way of finding the answer then looking at that last piece of the coordinated outfit, the frontlet that the priest was to wear on his forehead, because that piece was inscribed with the words “Holy to the Eternal.”

Of course, reading this, you might think for a moment that only the Priests were special to G-d, that only the priests were to be holy. But we are told to be “A Kingdom of Priests …”

In other words, we are all supposed to be special and we are all supposed to be holy. We are also supposed to emulate G-d. If G-d feeds the hungry, then we are to feed the hungry. If G-d clothes the naked, then we are to clothe the naked. And, if G-d finds people holy … if G-d loves others, then we to are to find people holy and love them.

Now, please don’t get me wrong, in Judaism we are not exactly fond of tattoos, so I am not suggesting that you have your loved ones tattooed on the forehead with the words “Holy to me.” But, I would suggest you try this to add to the holiness and the love in your life … each time you look at those you love, imagine those words on their forehead. Remember that we have the ability to decide what is holy and special to us.

In a perfect world, we would all be special to one another; but, for now, having just celebrated Valentine’s Day, at least see those words on your spouse, on your parents, on your children and then let those words change how you treat them.

Before you do something like getting angry or giving the silent treatment, before you tell them you don’t have time for this or that, don’t just imagine the words “Holy to me” on their forehead. Show them how Holy they are to you and show them how very much you love them as, when you do, you truly show them that they are consecrated unto you.

Shalom my friends,

Rabbi Craig H. Ezring

Rabbi Ezring is the spiritual leader of Temple Beth Israel of Deerfield Beach. We welcome you to join our warm and caring family for Shabbat and festival services. We’ll make your heart glow…who knows, you might even fall in love with Shul all over again.