Before rising to fame on NBC’s hit show The Voice, or opening for country super-star Toby Keith, or even headlining the Folds of Honor concert series, Corey Kent White, 21, sought a reasonable plan B.

I met Corey in 2011, following a presentation I made to his school about leadership and career exploration. After my talk, Corey found his way back to tap me on my shoulder. He had enjoyed my aviator stories and was eager to ask aviation-related questions. The airline pilot in me was happy to oblige.

That evening we connected via Facebook, where he shared his concern as a 16-year-old searching for direction:

“Pretty much, I am all over the place. I have a few connections in the music biz (and that’s my first love), but I also realize that it’s very difficult to make a living through music and a lot of it has to do with luck. So I am searching for a reasonable plan B.”

Instantly, I knew there was something special about this young man; while most teens are pushing the boundaries of adolescence, Corey was searching for a reasonable plan B.

I invited Corey to meet. We talked about God and what it would look like to scratch plan B and wholeheartedly seek God’s call. He was on board. Still hanging on my refrigerator is the list he wrote of his priorities, with God in the No. 1 spot.

Flash forward: Today, Corey has more than just a “few” connections in the “music biz.” He is making a living pursuing his love of music. He didn’t need luck, and attributes all his success to God. The millions who have bought his music are surely glad he didn’t pursue a “reasonable” plan B.

While it would be easy for him to drop God from the No. 1 spot, as he rides the momentum of his success, it’s Romans 12:1-21 that encapsulates his heart. He understands and applies what it means to give of his body to “be a living and holy sacrifice,” which Romans asserts is the true “way to worship [God].” Corey seeks accountability to keep himself from “[copying] the behavior and customs of this world,” by allowing “God [to] transform [him] into a new person by changing the way [he thinks].” It is this that allows him to confidently know God’s will for him, “which is good and pleasing and perfect.”

Corey is humble, honest in his evaluation of self so as to give credit to God over taking it for himself, recognizing that “we are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other” for the glory of God. He knows he’s been given a “special function” (as we all have), and by God’s grace “[He] has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.”

With this understanding, Corey uses his gifts to share the Gospel. He uses his platform to boldly profess the love of Christ to millions. His fruits reveal the passionate pursuit (ironically) not of music, but his call.

How does one with such a fandom and seemingly crowded schedule enthusiastically serve the Lord? Corey begins each day growing closer to God by trading in plan B for a reading plan—Scripture reading. This has allowed his prayer life to evolve from a formal “Dear God of the universe” prayer intro to “Good morning, Father.” Intimately knowing His Father allows him to pray without ceasing during the day, keeping him on track in pursuit of holiness as he seeks to align his life with the Truth found in the Word of God.

In the business of music, much is at stake; but, for Corey, and for each of us in our own right, growing closer to God and knowing who He has called us to become will ensure that we don’t need a reasonable plan B. We can rest in the assurance that the God of the universe is not some far off cosmic ruler, and, as Chris Tomlin sings, “God is a good, good father” and you can trust Him with your future. Just ask Corey Kent White.

C.J. Wetzler is the NextGen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

Ray Romano once said, “As a comedian, you don’t want to upset someone with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). They’ll write you a letter … and another one … and another one … and another one.”

We may laugh, but the reality is that OCD is crippling. People suffering from this condition develop compulsive behaviors in which they become obsessed with performing certain rituals repeatedly to only temporarily find relief from the plaguing anxiety. Simply put: Someone obsessing over their safety may lock and re-lock a door again and again. For many, this is a neurotic condition; they know the repetition is for naught. They understand that they are no safer whether they lock the same lock once or four times over.

If you’ve read this far, you’re either my mom or you’re curious to see what this has to do with Christianity. Allow me to explain.

While not true OCD, I believe many of us have what I like to call OCD Christianity. We’ve latched on to certain obsessions within our faith and have created rituals that help us feel more Christian. And, as with OCD, we recognize these behaviors and still perform them even though we know they do not draw us closer to God. If anything, they weigh us down and distract us from strengthening our personal relationship with Him.

To grasp my abstract thought, track with me through three things we obsess about. One, we obsess about condemnation. We see the world living in sin and think, “Turn or burn.” We use guilt and shame to bring people into the faith. Unfortunately, this approach makes God’s plan small and boring — uninviting and unexciting.

And, naturally, if we begin to obsess over condemnation for others, it’s not long before, two, we obsess about self-preservation — Are we saved? Are we good, God? Check out Luke 3:7, when John the Baptist addressed the Pharisees and Sadducees: “You brood of snakes! Who warned you to flee God’s coming wrath?” He pointed out that, just as snakes flee a brush fire to save themselves, these guys were only concerned about self-preservation, believing their rituals would save them. As much as it may pain us to admit, in this case, we probably relate more to the Pharisees and Sadducees than to the recent converts.

Three, we obsess over comfort — doing everything in our power to avoid being uncomfortable. Yet, nowhere in Scripture do we find a call to safe and comfortable living. Quite the opposite, right? This obsession blinds us from the realization that Heavenly comfort is facilitated by earthly discomfort.

So, there they are. I had to put them out there to say this: From these obsessions, we’ve created rituals that ransack our understanding of Matthew 7:22-23: “On judgment day many will say to me ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’” To put it in modern context: “Without leaving our comfort zone, we started a small group in your name and read our Bibles, and attended Sunday school, in your name, and even had a really cool event that grew our attendance … in your name, of course.” Yet comprehend carefully Christ’s response in Matthew 7:23: “But I will reply, ‘I never KNEW you. Get away from me…’” [emphasis added].

Wait, what? So there are people who do Christian-ey things and they won’t enter Heaven?

Yes.

God isn’t asking us to do things because they make us feel like Christians. He’s inviting us into an authentic relationship with Him. But, if we obsess about condemnation, self-preservation and discomfort, we’ll read our Bibles, pray, give of our time and resources, etc., because doing so will make us feel like “we’re good” instead of an effort to actually deepen our relationship with Him. We’ll miss the point completely — be His disciple; go and make disciples. It’ll all be, as with OCD, for naught.

But, be filled with hope! John the Baptist prepared the way for Christ, who would, once and for all, atone for our sins. Find joy in that we are free from having to lock and re-lock the door, metaphorically speaking. We can brake — put a stop to our obsessions — by fully surrendering to His will, by trusting Him at His Word, by accepting that He is our assurance of salvation. And then, out of our overflow, we will freely live the two most important commands: Love God and love your neighbor — without the crippling fruitless rituals which bring us no closer to being known by Him.

C.J. Wetzler is the NextGen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments, he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

The words God spoke near the end of the book of The Revelation of Saint John the Divine are among the greatest words of hope in the Bible. He spoke these words as he sat upon a throne: “Behold, I make all things new.” [Rev. 21:5] His words get our attention because, most of us, at least some time in our lives, have wished we could have the opportunity to start all over again, and perhaps do it differently, do it better the second time around. These thoughts can enter our minds at any time; but, somehow, they seem to make an annual appearance around New Year’s Day, when we’re thinking about resolutions and the things we could, and should, do to make our lives better next year than last year.

During the next few weeks, there will be no shortage of suggestions about what we can do to redress our lot in life during the coming year. None of us need to be reminded of the importance of taking better care of our bodies, enhancing our finances, strengthening our relationships and finding new ways to explore, and enjoy, our wonderful world.

We all know how important these things are to our well-being. These are things that we have the power, if not to change, at least to address. But what we may need to be reminded of is how important it is to have a mindset that allows us to turn over to our Lord the things we can’t control, so that, in the New Year, He can “make all things new.”

Let’s think of several things that can help us develop a positive mindset. First, a successful day is often defined by how we are able to deal with interruptions. Michael Ramsey, the 100th Archbishop of Canterbury, dealt with this challenge in The Christian Priest Today. He reminds us that we often meticulously plan our days only to have our plans turned upside down by interruptions so that “what we planned as order is turned to chaos.” Now here is where a positive mindset takes over. If we think of interruptions as God’s will, then our days have an entirely different purpose. Interruptions may be seen as God giving us an opportunity to redraft our plans to better serve Him, and to come closer to Him. This mindset allows us to see a day we might have seen as disordered as a day expressing God’s will, and “where that will is obeyed there is pattern, peace and harmony” – and a positive mindset.

Second, having a positive mindset is much easier when we remember not only whose will is behind the unfolding of our days, but also, who is the designer of our days. The Bible is packed with passages that tell us who is in charge and who has our backs when the going gets tough. The passage I turn to most often is Psalm 36, especially verses 7 and 10: “How precious is your loving kindness, O God! Therefore, the children of men put their trust under the shadow of your wings … Oh, continue your loving kindness to those who know you, and your righteousness to the upright in heart.” This is a psalm meant to be prayed by a true believer, someone who knows God and believes He can “make all things new.”

And finally, T. S. Eliot adds another facet to our ability to cope with bumps in the road, such as interruptions in our daily life and our forgetfulness about who is really in charge. He reminds us, in Four Quartets, that God’s ability to “make all things new” is not one of man’s futile hopes. Why? Because not only does God love us, but He will relentlessly pursue us until we give our lives over to Him, and then He will lead us where He wants us to go.

So, my dear readers, thoughtfully make your resolutions for the New Year, and honestly try to stick to them, but don’t be surprised if God reaches down and gently nudges you in a different direction. And, always keep in mind, what someone a lot smarter than me once said: “The Will of God will never takes you, where the Grace of God will not protect you.”

Rev. M. Tracy Smith, SSA, is Rector of the Saint Peter’s Anglican Church, 1416 SE 2 Terr., Deerfield Beach, FL 33441. For more information, call 954-695-0336. Wednesday: Morning Prayer at 10 a.m., Sunday: Holy Communion at 10 a.m.

In 2013, Life Church launched Restore, a digital learning experience with the vision of “doing better at doing good” by addressing poverty alleviation. A close friend of mine, Jonathan Meisner, served as one of the lead documentary filmmakers and speakers for the project. He graciously scheduled time to visit my classroom, sharing with my students a new paradigm regarding helping others, lest we do more harm than good.

Jonathan clarified that “poverty has less to do with money and more to do with relationships,” when you more aptly define poverty as being about broken relationships. We’ve been conditioned to recognize poverty solely as lacking material wealth. However, Restore identifies four major areas which also constitute poverty: a broken relationship between “us and God, us and creation, us and others, and us and ourselves.” By this new definition, people might find whilst driving their latest luxury vehicles that they, too, are impoverished.

The Restore experience reveals that while giving of resources is at an all-time high, the gap between wealthier countries and poorer ones has never been greater. This is largely due to our lack of understanding how to alleviate poverty, how to truly help. For far too long, we’ve told others what they need instead of asking them what they need. We’re great at relief, providing a temporary solution like bottles of water or charitable giving, but restoration, long-term investment — restoring broken relationships — here we’ve waned. As Simon Sinek states, we’ve turned helping into a business transaction, exchanging money and resources for the momentary pleasant feeling of goodwill.

If you recall, a rich man once approached Jesus and asked what one must do to inherit eternal life (Mark 10:17). He spoke of his strict adherence to the commandments, the things seen outwardly, yet Jesus wasn’t satisfied. In verse 21 Jesus says, “There is still one thing you haven’t done,” he told him. “Go and sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.’” Scripture tells us that the man “went away sad, for he had many possessions.” Rich, but in poverty; he had a broken relationship with God, being unwilling to wholly commit to his Creator. We’re quick to judge this man; yet, as we approach this Christmas season, aren’t we tempted to give “relief” only to feel better about ourselves? Are we ready to wholly commit to our coming King, accurately alleviating poverty by looking for relationships in need of mending and investing what is needed to restore them? That’s exactly what’s happening at Stonybrook.

I had a chance to speak with Chelsea Shoff, 25, a dedicated staff member for Urban Youth Impact, located in West Palm Beach. Shoff, along with various non-profit and government agencies, has been diligently restoring relationships in the Stonybrook housing project through after-school programs, adult workshops, Bible studies, and quarterly events in which volunteers and staff gather to show their love and support for the community.

Stonybrook has 220 housing units designated for single-parent homes; 450 kids call Stonybrook home. It’s been a “community plagued with violence, neglect, abuse, drugs [and] hopelessness,” says Shoff.

Yet, something incredible is happening. According to a recent article by Jason Hackett of WPTV, in the past six months, “calls for police service to the complex have dropped … 80 percent.”

Shoff credits much of the visible success to “parents stepping up and doing their part to want better for their families; kids grasping Jesus and wanting to change the way they act and think; [and] the community coming together more.” Relationships are being restored between God, creation, others and themselves thanks to the investment of dedicated volunteers and staff like Chelsea Shoff in the long-term success of the community.

What is your Stonybrook? Where do you need to invest your restoration efforts (not just relief)? Maybe you’ll get involved with Urban Youth Impact (www.urbanyouthimpact.com), serve students as a mentor,or possibly sign-up to tutor at a local school. Where and how will you pick up your cross daily? Pray about it. Ask God to use you this Christmas season to begin a journey of alleviating poverty through the restoration of relationships — between you and God, His creation, others and yourself.

C.J. Wetzler is the NextGen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

The whine of the Rolls Royce engine and oscillating whooshing sound from the four-bladed Bell 407 police helicopter hovering above echoed throughout the apartment complex’s hallways. Red and blue strobe lights danced upon the once dark and silent walls before gunfire had shattered the stillness of the evening.

“Over here,” called a first responder. “Look closely,” he said while pointing toward the lower abdomen of an adult male sprawled upon the ground being worked on by paramedics.

“You see these two small punctures?” said the first responder. “That’s where he was shot.” I had to almost squint; I’d never seen a shooting victim, nor had any clue what real gunshot wounds looked like. But there they were: what appeared to be two stab wounds by a No. 2 pencil.

Wasting little time, the victim was prepped for transport. A polite and calm paramedic looked over at me and said, “Wanna ride in the back with us to the hospital?” I needed to remain with the first responder I was shadowing for the evening, but I couldn’t help but notice the medic’s collected demeanor. For him, two bullets robbing a man of his pulse was simply another day on the job. He and the crew couldn’t let the reality of the situation distract them from their mission: saving lives.

I never learned the fate of the shooting victim, but I did become well-educated on the many other tragedies law enforcement personnel encounter during my many nights riding with the police, specifically drunk driving.

According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, “In 2013, 10,076 people died in drunk driving crashes,” and another “290,000 were injured” because of intoxicated drivers. One DUI Task Force sheriff’s deputy told me that, statistically speaking, 1 in 4 drivers after 10 p.m. in Palm Beach County are driving impaired.

I recall one night, while heading east on Forest Hill Boulevard, the deputy I was riding with noticed a van ahead crossing the lane markings. We kept our distance monitoring the driver’s behavior—all being recorded by the dash cam. With enough probable cause to make a legal stop —suspicion of driving under the influence — the deputy switched on the trademark red and blue strobes. A quick yelp of the siren helped the van’s driver recognize he was our target, which caused him to pull off the road and stop just prior to the I-95 overpass.

Cautiously approaching the driver’s side, the deputy quickly realized his suspicion was accurate. Accompanying the driver was an aging prostitute — her skin wrinkled and leathery-looking, undoubtedly from years of smoking. While the moment was heartbreaking, I remember the wise advice of the seasoned DUI Task Force deputy, “No one gets to make a choice that could rob someone else’s right to live.”

And that’s where my deep sense of gratitude resides —knowing that each day, police officers and deputies make the exact opposite decision that drunk drivers and other criminals make. Police initiate numerous choices that often put themselves in harm’s way so that no one is robbed of their right to live. Christ says in John 15:13, “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friend”— the citizens, in their case. Without a doubt, those behind the badge embody the United States Coast Guard rescue swimmer motto: “So others may live.”

So, dear officer or deputy, thank you for putting on the uniform daily. For knowing you’ll be second-guessed, have your food sometimes [spit in], and be bullied by the talking heads on television and trolls on social media. For rushing into the situations everyone else is running from. For often being the face of humanity, sacrificially serving your community, while the poor choices of a few of your brothers and sisters allows for a complete vilification of your chosen profession. Thank you for choosing to go to a “normal day on the job,” which really means guys like me and my fellow citizens are able to rest peacefully knowing, because of you, we may live.

C.J. Wetzler is the NextGen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

The words you speak every day carry more power than you realize. They have the potential to take your life – and the lives of those around you – in either a positive or a negative direction. To use your words for good, you must first begin focusing on certain categories of words while working to eliminate others from your vocabulary altogether.

Specifically, decide to create a habit of speaking words of praise and encouragement. At the same time, choose to steer clear of any kind of gossip or complaining. When you do, you will see a positive difference in your life and in the effect you have on other people. Here’s a quick look at each of these types of words to help you get started:

Praise – Words of praise shift your attention away from selfishness and toward God’s goodness. Try starting every day by praising God for who He is and for the blessings in your life. Let those words settle into your heart and become part of the wellspring you speak from for the rest of the day.

Encouragement – Everyone needs encouragement. As you begin speaking from a God-focused heart, encouraging words will come naturally. You will begin seeing other people as God sees them, which will make you want to use your words to help them grow in that direction. When you stop focusing on others’ shortcomings and, instead, become a source of encouragement, you are cooperating with God in building them into the people He wants them to be.

On the negative side of the equation, there are two major categories of words that can sabotage your life and your relationships. Speaking these words is like ingesting small, daily doses of poison:

Gossip – Gossip, in all forms, is destructive. Not only does it tear others down, it also deteriorates people’s trust in you. When you gossip, you are engaging in an activity that has no possible end result but harm. Others are hurt, and the noxious words seep into your soul, creating internal toxicity.

Complaints – Complaints become self-fulfilling prophecies. If you feed the small irritations in your life with words, they will grow into more substantial problems. The energy you spend focusing on them gives them heightened potential to derail your best life.

Nelson Searcy is the founding and lead pastor of The Journey Church in Boca Raton. Sunday services are held at 9:30 and 11 a.m. www.bocajourney.com.

On May 4, 1998, millions of Americans viewed part one of the final Seinfeld episode, aptly titled “The Finale.” Stuck in a small, unfamiliar Massachusetts town, Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer are witnesses to an armed carjacking. Showing little concern for the victim, Kramer hoists his large camcorder to film the event while the others poke fun at the driver, for both his physical appearance and ill-fated predicament. Their laughter fades when a police officer approaches the four and places them under arrest.

“What? No, no … We didn’t do anything,” said Elaine.

“That’s exactly right,” replied the police officer, charging them for violating the town’s newly passed Good Samaritan Law, requiring bystanders to take reasonable action to assist anyone in danger.

While behind bars, George said, “Why would we want to help somebody? That’s what nuns and Red Cross workers are for.”

We laugh at its absurdity: the idea that anyone would stand idly by while a fellow human was in distress, let alone film the event. Yet a few weeks ago, footage of a Southwest Airlines flight attendant “slurring his words” and “nodding off” during a safety demonstration was posted to LiveLeak. The story went viral, accusing the flight attendant of either falling asleep or being drunk.

While the digital world jumped to negative conclusions, a personal friend of the flight attendant reported that he was actually suffering from a medical condition, and was later hospitalized for a brain aneurysm.

What started out as a punchline to a ‘90s television show has become our 21st Century reality: film first, post later, feel good about our “likes.” Me. Me. Me. Surely this can’t be healthy?

Psychology Today reports that when we become “self-absorbed, it’s difficult for us to experience the world from other people’s perspectives. Other people become truly ‘other’ to us. And this makes it possible for us to inflict suffering on them,” or fail to help them when they are in need. Our cell phones are charged and ready for filming, yet, it’s our empathy, our ability to be human, which is depleted.

This is cause for concern as we consider the research of renowned psychologist Dr. Philip Zimbardo. In his TED Talk, Zimbardo asserts that the “slippery slope of evil — exercising power to intentionally harm people physically and psychologically” begins with the “dehumanization of others” via a “legal, political, economic or cultural background — a system” that “corrupts the individuals.”

Consider the recent national cases of police either being refused restaurant service or having derogatory remarks scribbled across their coffee cups. Let me be clear about what’s happening: Individuals are uniting against the police. There are those in our society — in every society — who do not understand the text of Romans 13:3, “For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong.” (Naturally, some have more to fear than others.) But, this is different. These individuals are uniting under the same pretense. A movement has been created, a system that is giving some people power and permission to dehumanize police, leading to the infliction of suffering against police officers, both emotional and physical. In short, evil.

Zimbardo later goes on to say that the antidote to evil is heroes: “Heroes are everyday people.” Police are everyday people. They are humans. Let us not lose our empathy, unjustly dehumanizing our peace officers. Let us recognize the true courage of those who put their life on the line during every shift, while so many of us idly stand to the side, camera phone in hand, waiting for our clip to go viral.

To all those who put on the uniform every day, thank you. Your service and sacrifice does not go unnoticed, and I believe substantially more citizens than those portrayed in the media agree that your lives matter. Not because you are a police officer, but because you are human, and to dehumanize a person is nothing short of evil.

C.J. Wetzler is the Next-Gen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments, he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

When you’ve predominately operated two- and four-seat single engine training aircraft, the opportunity to get your teenaged hands on an eight-seater twin-prop plane boosts the feeling of being a “real” pilot. I say “real” because this particular flight I was about to fl y was not a training flight, but for actual passenger transport. (Nothing like pretending to be in the big leagues.) I was crushed when my father informed me that my long-awaited trip was most likely canceled —something about all flights being grounded. Impossible. The date was Sept. 11, 2001.

We turned on the television moments before the second tower was struck by a plane. Weeks would pass airing stories of incomprehensible loss contrasted by unimaginable courage. Never before had I seen America, or even our allies for that matter, become so unified. Why does it take an immense tragedy for this level of cooperation to exist?

The nation tabled their political views and rallied behind President George W. Bush as he and Mayor Rudy Giuliani led the country through a time of mourning and rebuilding. Because of their leadership and resolve, as a teenager, I gained a new perspective on what it meant to be one — one nation under God, that is.

Fourteen years later and the unity has seemingly dissolved. Our America has become my America where we define patriotism in the same way Burger King takes our order: have it your way. This is a far cry from where we were when a packed stadium of fans, in unison, began chanting over and over “U-S-A!” following a ceremonial first pitch by Bush during game three of the 2001 World Series.

So what happened? When did our nation begin to divide like cells? When we made sin a thing to be tolerated, not eradicated. That’s right. We took things like anger, hate, lust, idolatry, greed, jealousy, selfishness and drunkenness and hid them behind a cause, not realizing they are all tools in the devil’s arsenal of division — perfect if you’re trying to keep the body from becoming one.

It’s time for a revival. Now, I’m not talking about pitching a big tent, getting the local hipster musicians together and preaching with extra syllables when you say “Jesus.” I’m talking about a revival of the heart — your heart, my heart.

The change we pray for in our nation isn’t going to come solely through a worship music rock concert or some fancy social media hashtag campaign. True change and restoration will occur when each of us clears our heart like Jesus cleared the Temple area of merchants. In John 2:15-16, Jesus says, “Get these things out of here. Stop turning my Father’s house into a marketplace!” He knew the Temple area was a sacred spot reserved for God. Don’t believe me? Go check out the moment in Genesis when God asks Abraham to sacrifice his only son — one he had waited his whole life to see born. Though God was not actually going to have Abraham take his son’s life, He did want to test Abraham’s heart, see if he was willing to clear the “Temple” space.

So there it is. To take from the Tim Timmons song Starts with Me, the change we seek begins when we Christians hit our knees.

We must clear our hearts as Jesus cleared the Temple so that, when we stand, we are ready (and filled with courage) to be the light in a country plagued with brokenness dividing us from being what we’re called to be: one nation under God.

C.J. Wetzler is the Next-Gen pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

To say that I was an excellent middle school football player would be a lie. Frankly, I stank. But I kept trying — mostly because scorching summer afternoon practices were followed with a refreshing ice cold carbonated beverage: the Slurpee.

I can remember one day, having been completely consumed with my Slurpee that I hopped in the wrong car, going so far as to buckle my seatbelt! It wasn’t until I heard from the driver, “Well, who are you?” before I realized my embarrassing mistake. I quickly unbuckled my seatbelt, tucked my tail between my legs and dashed back to my actual ride.

I suppose we all have similar mesmerizing Slurpee moments. In fact, I believe there is a pandemic of such infatuation moments happening today. Kids’ eyes are affixed to screens, teens to themselves via the selfie-stick (don’t get me started on that one) and adults to their work. At best, children are quiet, teens look their best and adults are efficient; at worst, children lack time-management, teens mask insecurities and adults neglect their responsibilities. But amidst such duplicity, I’d like to focus on one particular affixation as we prepare for back-to-school: grades.

It’s Cameron Dallas’ character Felix, in the movie Expelled, who says it best about grades, “Straight As, [they’re] the Holy Grail of Academia … catnip for parents” and the “reward for properly raising your kid.” But is it? Should it be? Will high marks keep your child from living in a van down by the river? Hardly.

As a former high school teacher, I’m not implying parents abandon their concern for the report card. All I’m suggesting is that we re-evaluate our obsession or, dare I say, all-consuming search for the “Holy Grail of Academia.” Here’s why: because grades (the end), have increasingly become more valuable than the effort to obtain said grades (the means), which has opened the door for grade inflation in both the high school and college realms.

It’s become a simple business transaction. The academic institution is looked upon favorably due to a booming population of students with high GPAs and parents are satisfied because of their child’s seemingly exceptional performance. Win-win, right? Except that such an emphasis drives students to judge their self-worth based on a letter (rationalizing whatever means necessary, like cheating, to achieve those high marks — the worldly standard by which they are measured.) I’m sorry to say, but straight As might mean nothing more than your child knows how to work the system.

I don’t mean to imply that all students with straight As are system manipulators. It’s this: Straight As or not, stop measuring your student solely by four letters. Understand that not all students are “A” students, and that’s okay. I can’t tell you how many times I watched academically-gifted students “earn” high grades with little effort and be praised, whereas students who busted their butt only achieved a “C” accompanied by little to no recognition (now that’s a tragedy).

And understand that when we receive something, like high letter grades, for something we didn’t work hard to obtain, that’s when entitlement rears its ugly head. So let’s change the paradigm.

Here’s my professional recommendation: Praise your student’s effort and help them understand their identity in Christ, because in all honesty, does anything else really matter? You can personalize Matthew 16:26 to read “And what [does your child] benefit if [they get straight As] but lose [their] soul?”

You know why being a terrible football player didn’t matter to me? Because I knew God had a different path for me — an awesome one and something only He could equip me to begin. So, this school year, let’s go #BeyondTheLetter when evaluating growth.

Look to Galatians 5:22-23 for the standard: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. Against such things there is no law.”

Is your student understanding what it means to love unconditionally? Finding joy during trials? Developing patience? Kind to others? Seeking a deeper understanding of faith? Gentle and exhibiting self-control?

If so, rest assured that no letter grade is going to stop the plans God has for your child — even should they fail a course or two along the way.

CJ Wetzler is the NextGen Pastor at First Baptist Church of Deerfield Beach. Before transitioning into full-time ministry, CJ was a commercial airline captain, and high school leadership and science teacher. For questions or comments, he can be reached at cj@deerfieldfirst.com.

One evening recently, my wife and I stopped into a small boutique shop in our neighborhood after dinner.

While browsing, I spotted a decorative plaque that read: Remember, as far as anyone knows, we are a nice, normal family.

The shopkeeper noticed my chuckle and said the plaque had been a huge seller.

My interest was piqued. I went home and did some research on the licensing of this quote. Turns out, it’s being printed on everything from coasters to clocks, and sales have skyrocketed in the last few years.

Why do so many people relate to the sentiment? Because, deep down, we all feel like our families aren’t what they should be.

There are skeletons in our closets. There are old scars and new wounds left by broken marriages, wayward children and countless disappointments.

Most of us even worry at one point or another that our families may border on being (gasp) dysfunctional. So we do our best to portray a nice, normal image to the on-looking world.

Here’s some comforting news: Every family is dysfunctional. The question is to what degree?

Family can be a source of support and grounding, but it can also be a hotbed for conflict and unresolved tensions. Thankfully, there are steps you and I can take to help keep our families strong and filled with love:

• Focus on God – Establish your family on a solid foundation by focusing on God.

Start by taking time to pray together every day. If you aren’t in the habit of praying as a family, it may be awkward at first. Don’t let that stop you. The cliché is true: The family that prays together stays together.

• Forgive Quickly – Every family is made up of flawed human beings. You’re not perfect and neither are those closest to you, so you aren’t going to get through life without being hurt. Decide to forgive your family members of their wrongs quickly. Showing grace and allowing for each other’s mistakes is the oil that keeps the machinery of family running.

Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32)

• Prioritize Quality Time

– Investing time in family members is essential to deepening relationships and keeping things on course. Build more family time into your routine:

• Have Dinner Together. Several times per week, have dinner as a family.

The dinner table is where community is built.

• Celebrate Successes and Special Occasions: Birthdays, graduations, weddings and holidays are powerful times to reconnect with family and focus on God’s blessings.

You and I have a responsibility to create healthy families, but we have to simultaneously turn them over to God. We can build foundations, but we can’t control outcomes.

As we put God first and then let go and trust him to work out his purposes, He will.

In the process, he’ll build strong, beautiful families who display his unconditional love to the world.

I would love for you to join me at The Journey – Boca Raton this Sunday at 9:30 or 11 a.m., as we continue our teaching series about a guy who knew a few things about family dysfunction and other hardships, Joseph: From Pit to Pinnacle.

As our guest, you’ll receive a free copy of Unshakable: How to Stand Strong Through Life’s Storms – an essential guide to weathering the inevitable difficulties we all face. Visit www. bocajourney.com for more details. I hope to see you there!

Nelson Searcy is the founding pastor of The Journey Church in Boca Raton.